I think she's going to be ok but it was pretty rough for a while. She still cries a lot and she keeps talking about the past and the future. The things we did, the things we did wrong, the things we will never get to do.
I'm handling it all with a detatchment that marks me as either a potential sociopath or a potential buddhist monk.
Here's hoping it's the monk.
I'm always the dumper in every realtionship so I know how your feeling right now. You feel cruel, mean and heartless. I guess I'm always the dumper due to the fact that I'm a very rational person and don't believe in dragging things out if it's not working. You're not a sociopath. You've just had longer to deal with these feelings then she has. She hasn't been thinking about breaking up and you have. You're both in different areas of grief. Good luck with everything. I shall continie to follow your progress. Your project reminds me of science class in school. Kind of like your treating your life as an experiment. It makes for good reading. Stay true to your values, morals and yourself and you will never go wrong.
ReplyDeleteFirst off, I really enjoy your blog. I am a premed student and everything in my life has to be tick tock tick tock. So if you don't mind, I'm going to live vicariously through you whilst you do something incredibly genius and brave.
ReplyDeleteSecond, from someone who has lost many loved ones in her life, I think the detachment is a defense mechanism for sanity.
You're doing fine. Just breathe
The human spirit is a truly remarkable thing. Just when one feels that there really is no possible way to pick up and glue all the pieces of one's self lying shattered on the floor back together, one finds a secret stash of crazy glue and begins the task of mending. Not all the pieces may fit together properly again but that is what makes us who we are, and at the end of the day everything and everyone is really quite ok - sometimes it just takes a little longer for one to see and believe this ;-)
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